XXIV.

Why is it that everytime i hit

"next blog"

i have to read about some random person's brats?



I don't care,

please stop blogging about them.

XXIII.

Dear Room,

Please stop spinning.

Love,

Stephanie

XXII.

Is it strange that the name

Edward Cullen

genuinely strikes fear into my heart?

Also keep in mind that i am extremely Drunk.
That is all.

XXI.

I've always wanted to be a writer-

But writing has lost it's glamor

No one Cares about the written word anymore.

XX.

I literally refuse to watch "Smart People" because the thought of watching

Dennis Quaid and Sarah Jessica Parker interacting

makes me nauseous.

XIX.

Now Strangers are offering to clean my car....

So this is what rock bottom feels like....

...oddly familiar.

XVIII.

One Time,

I was drunk at DisneyWorld

watching Finding Nemo- The Musical

Side Note: Everyone involved with the production

should volunteered to be shot and killed

because it was so horrible

minding my own business

and the large woman next to me whipped out her tit and started breast feeding...

So i took a picture.

She gave me a look like i was the weirdo.

People today...

bunch of savages.

XVII.

Hug?

Art Work By Stephanie De John

XVI.

Dear Lady in the car next to me who is doing her make up and is in curlers,

Nice.

Love,
Stephanie

XV.

 I'm thinking of Writing a Children's Book-

The Most Awkward Halloween Party

By Stephanie De John

XIV.

I signed into myspace for the first time in a long time

and i had a bunch of messages

"Hey sweetie, add me"

"Lookin hot, we should talk sometime"

and so on and so forth.

But there is just one that is so good i have to share it with the world.

Title: Please Endeavor to Reply

Subject:
Hi ya, I enjoyed going through ya profile. Its very interesting u know....I wanna know you better....I like making my friends happy....There is this saying that whatever you give to a woman she multiply it and give it to you double....Example give her money...she give you a palatable meal....Give her a warm smile...she give you happiness at home....Give her sperm...She give you a lovely kid.....Cheerio pretty...

He was from Nigeria though, so maybe this is an acceptable pick up line.

 And i thought the worst pick up line i've ever gotten was:
"I'd like to gang bang you, without the gang."

XIII.

Are people shocked at this news?

Because all I can think when I read the Headline:

"Pet Bear Kills Pennsylvanian Woman"

is:

Well, Yeah. It's a bear.

XII.

So....

Where are all those nice,
                                 awkward,
                                          borderline creepy,
                                                         wildly attractive,
                                                                      geeky guys
                                                                                that the movies tell us exist?

XI.

Driving down the road, I saw a sign that said:

"GIVE BLOOD"

So I did.






I'm beginning to get the feeling that i'm very impressionable.

X.

When People ask me "What's good?"

I sincerely have no idea how to answer them.

Do I say- "Nothing much."?
That sounds very pessimistic.

But if i say-

"Massages."

"Kobe Beef."

or

"Zombies"

I get looked at funny.

I'm just trying to answer your question.